Pointers for Parents are regular SHORT inspirations to bring hope and encouragement to parents. I hope to build a bridge between parents and teachers as it pertains to the education of children and how we can work together for the betterment of our kids.
Let Them Fail
Just the thought of report cards causes the strongest parent among us to cringe. The heart beats harder, the breathing becomes shallow, and knots in the stomach feel like writhing snakes. Maybe that is an extreme reaction, but for parents of kids who struggle in school, it can be reality. Somehow when our kids fail, we think we have failed as a parent in some way. The truth is that even parents who do everything right can still have a child who struggles to learn, so let’s just take the parent guilt right off the table. There is no point in placing blame, because that only delays moving forward. Report cards do not measure parenting skills. They do not measure teaching skills either. They measure a child’s progress based on assignments given on a given day. The point of a report card is to give information about the learner. If a student scores poorly, it tells those working with the child what areas need more support. That is NOT a bad thing and it does not reflect on you as a parent. The best way to help your child is to remember some things.
• The report card is not about you.
• The report card is not about the teacher.
• The report card is about your child’s learning.
• It is not their identity.
• There are nine weeks before report cards go out.
• You should not be surprised at your child’s grades.
• Read the take home papers…every week.
• Communicate with the teacher BEFORE report cards go out to see how you can help your child.
(That’s why I wrote this blog a couple of weeks before the grading period is up. 🙂 )
• Allow your child to experience their own consequences.
• You cannot do their work for them.
• Encourage your child that grades do not determine if he/she is valuable.
• Sit down and work with them on improving areas of weakness.
• Do not discount or diminish them.
• Point out areas of strength.
• Support those things fully.
• Recognize that not every student is good at every subject.
• Perfectionism stifles and crushes the spirit of a child.
• Be okay with “good enough” on some things.
• Remember in light of a whole life, grades on report cards are not that important.
• Enjoy your children while they are still children.